Stormy Daniels needs attention again — and, to her credit, she may have alighted upon the one target depraved, desperate and conspicuous enough to give it to her.
In an interview with the New York Post’s Page Six gossip columnists, Daniels — the former porn star legally known as Stephanie Clifford who alleged she had an affair with Donald Trump before he was president and was paid to keep quiet — implied that she wouldn’t mind knowing first son Hunter Biden in the biblical sense.
When asked if she would visit 1600 Pennsylvania Ave., Daniels responded: “If I was invited, I wouldn’t say no — but would anybody? I mean, I want to check out the White House.
“But no, I don’t know anybody in there. I’ve had no communications. Although — oh God, here I go again, I’m going to get myself in trouble — Hunter seems like he’d be fun to party with!” she continued.
Pro tip: If you’re best known for your pornographic oeuvre and you realize that saying something might “get myself in trouble,” don’t say it. Trust me, if you’ve managed to appear on film naked and having sex by your own volition and some thought sets off your spidey sense for its appearance of impropriety, it must be really bad.
Nevertheless, she persisted: “Everybody’s like, ‘Oh my God, he didn’t pay his taxes, he used [his money] on hookers and blow,’” Daniels told the Post
“I’m like, ‘Like you wouldn’t do the exact same thing if you thought you could get away with it.’”
One can assume Daniels will be expecting an IRS audit and several “random” traffic stops from K-9 units in the coming months.
And, by the way: For someone who’s done some particularly sordid things on camera, you would think that Daniels might have watched at least some of the footage that Hunter obsessively recorded of himself and which was revealed to the world after the dazed, drug-addled Beltway failson forgot his laptop at a Delaware repair shop.
Is decency on the ballot in 2024?
While plenty of it is pornographic, almost all of it looks like a man who is having anything but a good time as he consumes mind-altering substances and sex workers with the same dead-eyed indifference.
There’s not a whole lot we can show you, because this is a family website, but here’s Hunter smoking what appears to be crack and drinking a White Claw in a float tank:
WARNING: The following videos contains content some viewers may find disturbing.
Just when you think the sad Hunter Biden saga can’t get any more absurd a new video emerges showing Joe Biden’s son using what appears to be a crack pipe and cracking open a can of White Claw hard seltzer while sitting naked in a “float tank” during “detox” paid for by Joe Biden pic.twitter.com/TIGa4bamhw
— DLW🍊 (@Dlw20161950) July 7, 2022
Boy, doesn’t that look fun? And here’s a 2019 video allegedly of Hunter recording himself yelling at an escort he had hired, who the Washington Examiner reported could not speak English:
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Now, that looks like a guy who’d “be fun to party with,” no?
However, if Daniels manages to turn Hunter from the relative straight-and-narrow existence he currently holds — he’s reportedly been clean for several years, married, and now makes his money off of his doodlings, not lucrative international contracts — it would be perfectly within the Democratic Party brand.
Yes, the party that once had to hide JFK’s rather anodyne (by 2023 standards, anyway) record of philandering now has congressional staffers filming themselves having gay sex in a Senate hearing room (an incident which revealed further sex tapes recorded inside the Capitol), topless male-to-female transgender influencers at a White House LGBT pride event, and cocaine found by the Secret Service in a locker that nobody seems to know or care where it came from, Stormy Daniels and Hunter Biden having a romp in the Lincoln Bedroom and selling the recording to PornHub to pay off his tax bills seems like the next logical step.
Think about it. Both are talentless hacks best known for sharing, um, intimate moments on camera. Both are known to choose poor lawyers. One needs money, the other needs to stay relevant. In a post-morals D.C., they’re perfect for each other. It’s like a rated-X Hallmark movie.
Just make sure to keep him away from the White Claw.
